To be sem o verbo to be: motivação e afetos em minha trajetória de aprendizado e letramento em língua inglesa

Abstract

This monograph presents an autoethnographic investigation that critically analyzes the English language learning trajectory from childhood to teacher education, focusing on the interrelation between motivation and affects. It is with this intention — to understand, narrate, interpret and, perhaps, transform — that this work is born. By examining my own experience, I seek to contribute to a broader reflection on English teaching in public schools and its potential, limitations, and meanings. Drawing on theoretical frameworks by Dörnyei (1994, 2001, 2005, 2009, 2013), Gardner (1959, 1985, 2010), Ryan and Deci (2000) on motivation, and Spinoza (2009) on affects and conatus, this research employs evocative autoethnography to transform personal experience into an object of study, revealing how different contexts impacted my relationship with the language. The analysis demonstrates a striking contrast: while formal education, grounded in traditional grammar-translation methodologies and repetition, often generated boredom and frustration, informal and playful environments (videogames, music, internet, and films) acted as powerful catalysts for intrinsic motivation and joyful affects, fostering situated and multimodal learning. University education, particularly integrated skills courses and supervised teaching practicum, represented a turning point by introducing innovative multiliteracies pedagogies from scholars such as Rajagopalan (2011), Leffa (2011), Tagata (2014), and Ribas (2007, 2008), reframing English as a living tool for critical communication and social intervention. The study concludes that motivation is constructed and transformed through affective experiences, with educators playing a crucial mediating role in fostering positive experiences. This work advocates for breaking away from traditional decontextualized practices in favor of a pedagogy that values students' cultural universes, integrates technologies, promotes playful learning, and creates engaging environments. Thus, it becomes possible to foster joyful affects and enhance students' intrinsic motivation, contributing to truly emancipatory, inclusive, and transformative English teaching in public schools.